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April 11, 2008
One bonus of living here and not 3,000 miles away is that I get to see my dad at least every other week, if not more (instead of visits maybe twice a year and the obligatory weekly phone call consisting of talking about the weather). And now that he's up on his feet again, he's able to come into the city, instead of me having to trek on BART to his place.
I'm happy his knee has healed and that life is looking up for him. He even has a new ladyfriend and he's totally smitten. He can't say a sentence without uttering her name. There's even talk of moving in together. She's really into biking and hiking and gardening and..... well, my dad is, to put it mildly, a more sedentary person. But somehow she convinced him to get these new state of the art orthopedic shoes. She has a pair herself and says it's like walking on clouds! She's so into these shoes that the first time I met her, she insisted I try hers on and walk around the apartment for a "test drive." They were indeed bouncy (though they did not, as they would seem to, enhance my jumping ability ten fold) but don't think I'll be sporting these any time soon. My dad, however, bit the bullet and got a pair that looked like this:
His had velcro though, not laces. These beauties are called Z-Coils and you have to sign a waver before you buy them, releasing the company from any liability should your use of the shoes result in injury and/or death.
He tried them out for a few days but felt really awkward in them and nearly broke his neck when a rung on a bar stool he was sitting on got caught on the coils. And considering he just stopped using a cane and is still a little wonky on his legs, he thought maybe the shoes were a little too much for him. So he decided to return them to the store, which happens to be near where I live.
Last week, he tried to return them but forgot the box and they wouldn't take them back without it. So he came back again yesterday and we planned to go out to dinner afterward.
I wish I had remembered my camera to take pictures of the inside of the store. The posters in there were hysterical. Apparently, if you are walking in regular shoes, you are doing irreparable damage to your back and will end up looking like a hunchback. Forget that most humans have been wearing non-coiled shoes for tens of thousands of years. What you really need are GIANT COILS ON THE BOTTOM OF YOUR SHOES. Some people swear that they really do eliminate back and joint pain and enable you to stand for extended periods of time without discomfort. Some people are also blind.
When the sales guy asked why he was returning the shoes, my dad said had written it down on the "reason for return" card. He had marked the box that read: "shoes are not socially acceptable at my place of work/style not compatible with my lifestyle." He emphasized that these shoes made him self-conscious and that "style and image are very important" in his line of work (ha! I'm sure his patients wouldn't even notice if he came into work in a kimono). The sales guy, obviously a devotee of the Coil, looked crushed. He called his manager on the phone and sighed, "We got another return." I had to leave the store at that point because I couldn't stifle my laughter any longer.
Ah what we do for love.
Posted by debbie at April 11, 2008 12:22 PM